How does one deal with the Holiday blues? To be depressed and disappointed when the rest of the world seems filled with joy and excitement is one of the most difficult experiences to have in our lives. Yet, every holiday there are tens of millions of people that find the holidays a difficult struggle and rejoice when they are over because they know that inwardly they are not filling happiness but instead sadness.
There are many reasons for the holiday blues. The holidays can force us to face the fact that we are in real financial trouble and cannot give the gifts we would like unless we want to add to our already over burdened credit card debt. For others this season is mixed with the loss of a loved one. Perhaps this Christmas will be the first one where that person is not around the table. Their loss is felt deeply and their contribution to the dynamics of the family is experienced. Sometimes the holidays force us to face the fact our family is split, divided, and alienated. We are alone not because of death but because of conflict. The New Year might just remind us that we enter it without any hope of our dreams being reached and the sense that our visions have died. We do not enter the new year with goals but with fear of losing what little we have left. All of these factors and many others can make the holidays a crisis of soul.
How do we fight the holiday blue? First to remember that the real message of the holidays is about God’s undonditional love for us in the middle of our struggles. God did not come to seek the happy but the helpless in the Messiah Jesus. Therefore, if we are feeling hopeless and helpless we are the very ones for whom Messiah Jesus came. He said only the sick need Him. If we confess that our soul is sick then we are qualified to have Messiah Jesus give us some of His joy freely. Maybe we need to allow ourselves to really listen to the message of the Chirstmas carols. They are not about how life is great, they are about how God loves us in our difficult and struggling lives. How God has decided to forgive our failures and give us paridise as a gift paid for by the death of His Messiah Son Jesus. The Holidays are Holy Days because they remind us of good news intended for those who feel poor in spirit. Maybe those who are not confessing their spiritual poverty are really the ones out of touch with the spirit of the season. Maybe in our struggle and pain we are the ones most ready to hear the wonder of God’s love and be touched by His grace.
Second, just decide to not be rushed or pressurred into doing more than your soul can take. Seek to have a meditative and quiet time. Seek fellowship with people who are safe. If you are emotionally fed by being alone then give yourself some thoughtful walks and take time to journal. If being around people helps you then most churches will be having events that allows you to have a spiritual family even if your physical family is not able to be with you.
Third this may be the time to find a counselor, coach, or spiritual director. Out of the ashes of the past you can decide to reframe and renew a search for answers. Out of the hope of the holidays you can decide to respond with new hope. If you need comfort for a loss, now is the time to begin a journey of healing and if despair had dominated your life, now is the time to seek hope. The holidays are a problem but they are also a potential.
I hope that you will feel the presence of the God who loves you more than your wildest dreams of God’s love. Even if you are angry with God, He is loving you. God loves His enemies. He understands your pain better than anyone else. He understands you better than anyone else. He is inside your mind and heart. Your soul is naked before God. He embraces you in Christ. In that embrace is healing. Open your heart to that comforting embrace this holiday season.